The emergence of the internet has enabled not only virtual communication but also virtual friendships. The online communication and relationships have become part of the world today. They have affected a large part of the world’s population. However, the emergence of the virtual friendships has brought forth the question of quality in the social relationship. The paper compares the quality of online friendships against the face-to-face or offline friendships. Using the social needs theoretical perspective, the paper evaluates the two forms of friendships and compares which meets the social needs such as self-validation, intimacy and companionship.
Online and Offline Friendships
The description of an online friend is that of a person who only appears in social contacts; for example, on the social platforms such as Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter among others. The nature of relationship existing is virtual. The friends are included in the contacts because they are online friends with other mutual friends, or one attended the same class in school. On the other hand, offline friends are the friends that one can access and communicate with face-to-face. An offline friend is a friend that one may have met in the past, shares common experiences, and one enjoys meeting. Mesch and Talmud (2006) write that the qualities of the two forms of relationships are based on the nature of social ties created and maintained. Writing about the online friendships, Mesch and Talmud (2006) note that they are created and maintained using the internet.
The applicable theoretical perspective is the social needs perspective. Mesch and Talmud (2006) write that the social needs perspective furthers the arguments people form relationships for the sake of self-validation, intimacy, and companionship. There are two expected outcomes in social needs namely; negative and positive relationship. The quality of either the online and offline friendship is, therefore, whether the relationship created is positive or negative. Additionally, the difference between online and face-to-face friendship is on the strength of the social ties. The following discussion evaluates elements in relationships that compare the strength and weaknesses in social ties of both online and offline friendship.
Self-validation
The quality of friendship in online and offline friendships can be compared by evaluating the level of self-validation. Xie (2017) defines self-validation as the ability to accept one’s internal experience. Self-validation is also the ability for one to build his or her own identity. Mesch and Talmud (2006) write that self-validation is one of the reasons why individuals form relationships. Self-validation is enhanced by the nature of support an individual is shown by his or her friends. The quality of self-validation is different in online and offline friendships. In online friendships, an individual’s level of association is limited. On the other hand, in face-to-face friendship, the level of association is high. Importantly, in offline friendship, validation of other people is higher as opposed to personal or self-validation.
Self-validation requires personal space. The presence of other peoples elevates the chances of validating other people as opposed to validating one-self. Xie (2017) argues that self-validation requires listening to oneself, feeling one’s sadness and pains, and challenging oneself. These qualities are associated with online friendship, where, other than virtual communication in social platforms, there is no physical presence of the friends. Physical friends can distract from deep thoughts, hence low self-validation. Face-to-face friends can lower the ability of accurate reflections or acknowledging the internal state of oneself.
Companionships
Companionship is a determinant of the strength of social ties between friends. Mesch and Talmud (2006) write that friendship is more than ‘just friends’. Friendship must involve companionship. Companionship is when the friendship is close to an extent one can share matters that are close to one’s heart or are internal experiences. The research carried out by Mesch and Talmud (2006) reported the adolescents had weaker closeness or social ties. Closeness is stronger when there is physical presence of the friends. In the study, the adolescents reported that while the preference of online friendship was high, the majority of the respondents have never met their online friends. Their communications are virtual, hence, lowered levels of attachment and closeness. The companionship is weak.
Offline friendship is meeting or having an association with real friends. The friends can meet to share their experiences and support one another. Closeness creates strong social ties. Social ties result in strong companionship. For example, face-to-face communication and relationship can result in intimate friendship or marriage, which creates companionship. As written by Xie (2008) compares companionship to confidant relationship. Xie (2008) notes that the confidant relationships are stronger in physical friendship as opposed to online friendships. In addition, Xie (2008) writes that offline relationships have helped in the elevation of weak companion relationships in the online relationship. This is where online friends meet physically to know one another more.
Intimacy
The concept of intimacy in relationship is when the friendship ties have strengthened to create familiarity, cosy, and private friendship. The euphemistic definition of intimate relationship is that the friends involved express their closeness sexually. A friendship becomes intimate when the level of proximity in the friendship is high. The duration of the friendship in intimate relationships is long. While friendship developed in the online platform can also become intimate, the offline friendships have higher chances of creating strong social attraction than the online friendship. The social ties in online friendship are weaker than the social ties created in face-to-face friendship (Mesch and Talmud, 2006). Mesch and Talmud (2006) however note that the indication by the literature is that online friendships can also turn intimate. This is when the nature of the online content is personal and intimate in nature. Mesch and Talmud (2006) add that offline friendships may not be intimate if the strength of the social tie is weak and the online friendships can be intimate if the strength of the tie is strong and the online interactions are cosy and private.
Conclusion
The paper has compared online and offline friendships. The online friendships are the friendships that are created and maintained on social platforms. On the other hand, offline friendships are friendships that are created and maintained physically or face-to-face. The paper has focused on the strength of social ties as the determinant of the quality of the two forms of friendships. Using the theoretical perspective of social needs, the strength of social ties is determined by relationship elements such as intimacy, companionship, and self-validation. The paper has compared the elements to compare the online and offline friendship. In summary, out of the three, it has been noted that online friendships are strong only in creating self-validation or the ability to understand oneself. Offline friendship is strong in creating intimacy and strong companionship.
References
Mesch, G.S. and Talmud, I. (2006). Online friendship formation, communication channels, and social closeness. International Journal of Internet Sources, 1(1), pp. 29- 44.
Xie, B. (2008, September). The mutual shaping of online and offline social relationships. Journal of Information Research, 13(2), pp. 1-18.
