The author got things going right
The author got things going right with a title that accurately reflected the paper's main argument without overtly alluded to the issue at hand. The essay's case was clearly summarized in the introduction, which also included relevant background information. Additionally, the essay's rhetorical appeals were effectively incorporated by the author.The author ought to have used a stronger "hook," such as a statistic outlining the terrible effects of using a phone while driving, a powerful statement, etc. The writer included a defensible thesis statement that further suggested the organization of the paper and certainly left no doubts about the author's position. The thesis statement was, however, rather weak because it stated an obvious statement of fact. An alternative thesis statement would have been: "Cell phone use while driving is the most prevalent cause of distracted driving among American adults."
3. Describe and of an of the be be one or
The writer included a brief history and a plausible overview of the problem outlined in the thesis statement. Evidence to support the issue was also tabled using appropriate scholarly resources. The writer went ahead and started outlining possible solutions to the problem at hand which was outside of the scope stipulated in the third requirement of the criteria.
4. etc.) and for be ortwo (1-
The author articulates the problem associated with distracted driving; distracted drivers are seldom identifiable which further aggravates the problem because the implementation of laws and policies against them would be futile. There was no topic sentence to introduce the paragraph and further develop the thesis statement. There is a need for substantial supporting pieces of evidence in the form of direct quotes, statistical data, etc. The writer ought to have given more details pertaining the problem, by, for instance, citing the adverse actions that would result from distracted driving.
5. and for beone or (1-2)
The writer uses a catchy topic sentence. Further, the quotes used are crucial in enhancing the credibility to the information relayed. There is need to cut on redundant repeated statements such as "Texting requires a visual, physical, and intellectual attention from the driver."
6. etc.) and for be ortwo (1-2)
The writer organized the paragraph appropriately. There were not substantial citations to back up the claims of laxity of lawmakers in formulating and implementing laws and policies about driving and texting.
7. Use effective transitional words, phrases, and sentences throughout the paper.
Certainly, the manuscript is interesting with a good sentence structure and grammar. There are a few hitches in the use of tenses, and root verbs (has/have). The writer needs to include transitional words to serve as cues to the reader.
8. a that a The conclusion is clear and to the point
The conclusion is clear and to the point. It has summarized the main points and effectively wrapped the main arguments besides offering recommendations. The thesis statement has also been restated, which is commendable. Alternatively, instead of using a recommended plan of action as a closing statement, the conclusion could have adopted a quotation as a closing sentence. The quotation should relate to the focus statement and provoke the reader into thinking more about the problem statement. For instance, a closing sentence for this essay could have been: "Stop the texts, stop the wrecks."
9. Develop a coherently structured paper with an introduction, body, and conclusion
The essay had all the components as stipulated.
10. Support at (3) Center.
The references were quality and relevant to the research question. Where used in the in-text citations, the references were properly cited. Some of the information mentioned needed to be cited appropriately to validate its credibility in addition to avoidance of plagiarism. For instance, the percentage of the time spent behind the wheel as stated in the first paragraph should have been cited to credit the source of information.
