What Effects Divorce Has on Children in a Family

Divorce can be a traumatic experience for many organizations, including the family unit. Children are particularly vulnerable, and some of them succumb to substance addiction and other social ills such as prostitution. In an attempt to get recognition, they enter poor firms and end up ruining their future lives. Children's physical and psychological well-being are affected by their parents' partnership, and divorce reduces their interest in other relationships (Maccoby, Depner & Mnookin, 2014). Divorce is the initiation of a chain of family troubles that will last for decades. Children are the casualties of divorce, and some may struggle to adjust to a new environment without their parents. The negative effects are more on health, education attainment, religion, and community and they include weakened parent-child relationships, destructive ways of handling conflict, and diminished social competence among others.
Parental-child relationship is greatly affected by divorce due to custodial challenges. When one is given the custody of the child the other one may disagree and this may lead to emotional challenges and poor academic performance (Anthony, DiPerna & Amato, 2014) Divorced mothers and fathers give less social, physical, and emotional support to their kids compared to the married ones. The parents have to adjust their new roles of parenting since many are stressed and cannot provide the necessary support to their children. Divorced mothers show less affection to their children and communicate less with them leading to deterioration in their discipline. They may also find it difficult to deal with their sons especially disciplining and guiding them. Another issue is that the contact between children and their father may not fare well for non-custodial dads since it keeps on declining over time (Kalmijn, 2013). After a breakup issues between fathers and sons deteriorate greatly and children may experience unhappy life. It is worse for older children since there is more hostility as the divorce occurs. Once the parents remarry, the stepfamily may make the situation more painful for the stepchildren as they may disagree with the new parents. Even the parents may not enjoy their newly found love and family as they would with their natural families as Hetherington and Arasteh (2014) argue. Although parents may think that it is their best to separate, children have a different opinion and think that the parents are simply selfish. The emotional distance continues to adulthood and may ruin their future relationships with their partners. Children who experience divorce develop destructive ways of handling conflict since it diminishes their capability of resolving issues. Children who grow in intact families learn to handle various kinds of conflict since their parents are present to give the guidance they require.
Divorce diminishes the capacity of children to handle conflict. One important difference between marriages that stay intact and those that end in divorce is the couple’s ability to handle conflict and move towards an agreement (Kalmijn, 2013). Students from broken families tend to use violence more frequently when they are faced with challenges. Some may engage in fights with colleagues and find it difficult to forgive those that wrong them. Their aggressiveness can be associated with the psychological trauma they face during the divorce process. Parents shout while arguing, some fights, while others assault each other. Their social competence also diminishes such that they find it difficult to participate in social activities in school and other places. Children who experience divorce go through less affection, responsiveness, and are punished more which affects their social wellbeing (Kalmijn, 2013). Poor social skills may lead to rejection by their peers and the few friends they have may not be able to help them in dealing with the loss. They also have diminished femininity and masculinity especially teenagers with feelings of inadequacy. Peer rejection may lead them to feel that they are unlovable leading to a poor love relationship. Attachment to both parents is necessary for children to develop into mature and responsible human beings and build their families.

Divorce may lead to increased trouble in courtship especially for children as they reach adulthood. Parents play a big role in shaping the behavior of their children and after a divorce several problems emerge. Children may wonder why their parents cannot resolve their issues and dedicate their lives to them since matters relating to marriage are difficult to understand especially for young children (Afifi, Granger, Joseph, Denes & Aldeis, 2015). Sometimes they may think that they are not loved or are the cause of the conflicts in their families. Some children experience failed romantic relationships and may have more partners during dating time. This can lead to sexually transmitted diseases some of which are incurable. Raising children in a good environment is recommended to ensure that they grow as responsible citizens in the society. If divorce occurs when children are in their teenage years, the situation is very difficult and can have negative consequences on the development of children. Young adults of the divorced parents have less trust on their partners and end up with unstable families. They also have a greater fear of rejection, which leads to conflict and hinders deepening of their relationship. The expectations of children of divorced parents in marriages change since they expect conflict as it happened with parents. They are never ready to find solutions to problems thinking that it may never work. Some of them may value divorce and have a negative attitude towards marriage. Men from divorced parents can be hostile and may never cooperate with their partners in decision-making processes. This interferes with consensual agreements with other people and increased teen sex leading to bearing children out of wedlock. Daughters of divorced parents tend to engage in premarital sex outside of marriage since they may never value marriage anymore.

Divorce has negative consequences on the family especially children since they are the main victims when parents decide to quit and live separately. They become confused and sometimes do not know the one to defend in such a case. Psychological trauma is common, as children have no one to turn to when in trouble. Boys may find it challenging to discuss issues with their divorced mothers and girls may also face challenges when dealing with their fathers. This can ruin their future since they become confused and may turn to drug abuse, premarital sex, or have rebellious behavior. Some choose to cohabit in marriage instead of legalizing their relationships with their partners. Making family decisions also become challenging for lack of trust making it difficult to resolve issues. It is possible for such marriages to disintegrate due to poor communication between couples. The presence of two parents in bringing up of children matters a lot since they act as their role model. Whenever a divorce occurs, children are left with no one to mentor him or her fully to ensure they grow up as responsible citizens.

References
Afifi, T. D., Granger, D. A., Joseph, A., Denes, A., & Aldeis, D. (2015). The Influence of Divorce and Parents’ Communication Skills on Adolescents’ and Young Adults’ Stress Reactivity and Recovery. Communication Research, 42(7), 1009-1042.
Anthony, C. J., Diperna, J. C., & Amato, P. R. (2014). Divorce, Approaches to Learning, and Children's Academic Achievement: A Longitudinal Analysis of Mediated and Moderated Effects. Journal of School Psychology, 52(3), 249-261.
Hetherington, E. M., & Arasteh, J. D. (2014). Impact of Divorce, Single Parenting and Stepparenting on Children: A Case Study of Visual Agnosia. Psychology Press.
Kalmijn, M. (2013). Relationships between Fathers and Adult Children the Cumulative Effects of Divorce And Repartnering. Journal Of Family Issues, 0192513X13495398.
Maccoby, E. E., Depner, C. E., & Mnookin, R. H. (2014). Custody of Children Following Divorce. EM Hetherington & JD Arasteh, Impact of Divorce, Single Parenting, and Stepparenting on Children, 91-112.